OMG it's been awhile...

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!!!  The twins really enjoyed their first Christmas just to bad they both were sick & mommy was too.  One Friday Christmas Eve we started out at Grandma & Grandpa Ischay's for the first part of the day & then we ended the day at G&G Saggio's & there were lots of people there & they got lots of gifts.  They had a very, very busy but fun day!  Christmas day is when everyone woke up sick & so we just chilled at home & did nothing all day. 

Well everyone is doing better except DH is sick now. 

So I went out & bought the twins their first toothbrush & toothpaste & we started brushing their teeth to get them use to using a it.  I'm also trying to teach them to walk.  Joey has already taken his first steps & Addi has just started letting go of things & standing there w/o holding onto anything so I'm hoping it's only a matter of time.  You can tell that they both want to get up & take off, but they cannot figure out how.  I cannot believe they are going to be a year old in just alittle over a month :-( it makes me very sad, I miss them at tiny babies in some way, but it's awesome to see them grow & mature over the months.  I'll tell you that's been the best experience ever. 

I'm so happy all the holiday's are over, b/c we are offically BROKE :-(.  I looked at our banking accounts just a bit ago & I almost cried b/c we have NO money, our savings it gone.  Oh God please don't make anything go wrong where we need emergency cash until we build it back up.  Go figure my engine light came on this morning!!  WTH.  Tears are forming in my eyes right now b/c I do not like this no money thing I really don't like it at all, I'm scared to death!!!!  Please, please, please don't let anything go wrong & please, please let us rebuild our savings back up quickly.  This is frightening...

Just not feeling it today....

I'm really just feeling overwhelmed, upset, ashamed, guilty today.  My sister Sam came in to visit from Denver & she, my sister & her BF & my nephew, my parents, my cousin Denise all came over for some pizza after work & just so everyone can see each other.  Well first off my DH had a Christmas party for his work & got there alittle after everyone arrived.  So we all ate & DH just did other things, so I ASSUMED he wasn't hungry cuz he would have ate at the party.  Well after everyone left he started playing a damn guilt trip on me like always (b/c he knows I get easly upset/guilty)  I said I cannot believe you didn't leave me any pizza... Ok first off when you saw us all eating why didn't you come over & eat.  Also he said he didn't eat at the party (Ok what did you do then???).  So ok he made me cry.  Then I've got a situation w/ our babysitter all off sudden smoking in the downstairs bathroom.  Our house is smoke free & I have childern in my house & one that's already has congestion when she breathes.. Why would you feel like smoking in the house????  I understand it's cold out, but come on treat it like a job & you cannot smoke on a job you have to go outside to do it.  This is the second time I've noticed my bathroom smelling like smoke.  My husband won't say anything to her b/c he's affraid she'll get mad & quit & I don't have the guts to confront her about it myself.  Also my DH has known her since he was a kid b/c he is BFF's w/ her son.  I do understand its our house & we should tell her to please don't smoke in it, but I don't know how to tell her w/o putting bad vibes between us & creating awkward moments from that point on.  I HATE awkward moments.  I wish my DH would understand that this is about the kids & their health.  I know I hate my house smelling like smoke & I don't want that bathroom to start smelling like it all the time & think about how it'll turn buyers off when we do go to sell it.  I can deal w/ that right now no matter how much it bothers me, but what scares me & bothers me most is the twins health. I don't want them around 2nd hand smoke it's as bad as 1st hand & especially on babies who are still developing.  I just need some idea's on how to tell her w/o hurting her feelings or sounding rude or mean.  UGH, What should I do?????

So I'm just feeling blah cuz I have that on my mind & then the whole stupid pizza thing w/ DH & I'm just feeling so damn bad right now.  I sersiouly have tears in my eyes.  That's just who I am, I'm very emotional.  I also want to have some sexy time w/ DH since we didn't get to last night cuz I was asleep before he came up & when I mentioned it to him today he just kinda said "Blah"... He said where's my pizza.. Whatever, please just drop it.  I just feel like I cannot do it anymore.. I try so hard to provide for my family & be the best wife/mom I can.  I'm running out.  DH has another X-mas party for his ex-employer (which he really doesn't have to go to, just going for free beer/food) it starts at 3pm & his boss is letting him go early, so I kindly asked him if he can be home by the twins bed time so he can help me... (that's 4.5-5 hours of drinking/eating socializing) he said no I don't think I'll be home by then, anyways I know he'll be drunk by then so I don't really know how much help he'll be anyways, we'll probably end up arguing all night & end up w/ me crying.  So anyways the reason I asked him to be home is b/c I offered to watch my BFF daughter who is about a year & a half from like 7pm-11pm.  I'm just worried that it's going to be hard to put the twins to bed w/ her cuz what do I do w/ her then... Stick her in the pac-n-play until I have them in bed so I then now for sure she is safe by herself for a few minutes while I put them to bed??  That is the only thing I'm worried about & what if the twins are having a bad day that day & I need help???  What if I have 3 cranky babies by myself along w/ two annoying dogs to deal w/????? 

Ok, well I'm done venting, but really not feeling better getting that out like I thought I would.  I just cannot wait for the weekend to be over....

Christmas is coming....

I'm actually so very excited to finally get to spend a Christmas the way I've always hoped & prayed to one day........... with a family of my own.   Of course we'll be going over to my parents house & DH parents, but just to finally have a son & daughter of my own to spoil is the best thing ever.  I really don't want anything else for Christmas b/c I have all that I can ever ask for.  I told DH to not spend anything on me & just get the twins something this year.  I just cannot wait their 1st Christmas.

This Saturday 12/11 we get their Christmas pictures back & so that means I'm going to have to do a mad rush with getting x-mas cards out w/ the photos in them.  Also start looking for frames for the photos we're giving to family for x-mas. 

I've go so much going on & things I want to get done w/i these next few weeks.  Then once Christmas is over it'll be time to start planning the twins 1st birthday party.. I cannot believe it 2 months away :-( makes me so sad & I want another one soooo badly. 

First steps

Joey offically took his first steps two days ago & he's been practicing since.  We will have a offical walker soon.......  Addi is not interested in it yet, but give her time.  Other then that nothing new Joey is breaking his top front teeth & the ones next to them so he's breaking four at once.  Addi is still working on her #5&6. 

OH my it's December!!

I cannot believe it where did this year go?  Well I haven't updated in a while, but nothing much new has taken place.  The twins had their first Thanksgiving & they both had their own plates of turkey, stuffing, sweet potato's, cranberries, green bean cassorole & they enjoyed it.  It was a wonderful Thanksgiving. 

Last night we took them for their Christmas pictures & I was alittle worried about how Joe was going to react b/c go figure of all days he decided not to take a nap & w/ Addi & her shyness towards strangers.  But we lucked out & they did wonderful & they look awesome.  I cannot wait to get them back or for them to go up on the website. 

So other then that I feel like I'm coming down w/ a cold.  The last two days I've been alittle stuffy & I have a sinus headache today.  I wish it would just come already & stop w/ these few days before....